stuck in corporate hell
Jan. 29th, 2002 12:11 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mamajoanSo my four-year anniversary of working at my company has come and gone, and not a single word of recognition. Am I bitter? Fuck yeah. You better freakin' believe it.
I mean, yes, the salary freeze means that I'm not getting a raise, and I've known this for months. No surprise there, although that doesn't mean I can't still be bitter about it. ;-P And I have said, and still feel, that doing a yearly performance review would feel pretty damn pointless under those circumstances. But, you know, a little teeny bit of positive reinforcement might have been nice. A pat on the back, a "nice job, glad you're still with us." Anything. Throw me a crumb here for chrissake, I'm like the starving dog under the table, it could be the tiniest ickiest crumb and I'd still probably go for it. It might make me feel good, even. For a whole five minutes. That would be something.
If only the job market weren't so terrible. If only I had the guts to just up and quit without getting a new job first. (I can hear y'all yelling back the Rocky-Horror-style retorts now: "But it is! But you don't!") So alas, I'm pretty much stuck in this job for the foreseeable future. And that sucks right now. Yeah, there might actually be some interesting stuff coming down the wire, work-wise. But, you know, I'm a chick and a Pisces and a human being, and when you put it together, it means I need more fulfillment out of life. I need to feel like I'm appreciated, like I'm doing something pointful, like I'm not just another automaton or monkey sitting at a desk.
I have really got to get those curtains to hang in my cube. Somehow I feel like they'll make me feel better, even though that makes little sense.
I mean, yes, the salary freeze means that I'm not getting a raise, and I've known this for months. No surprise there, although that doesn't mean I can't still be bitter about it. ;-P And I have said, and still feel, that doing a yearly performance review would feel pretty damn pointless under those circumstances. But, you know, a little teeny bit of positive reinforcement might have been nice. A pat on the back, a "nice job, glad you're still with us." Anything. Throw me a crumb here for chrissake, I'm like the starving dog under the table, it could be the tiniest ickiest crumb and I'd still probably go for it. It might make me feel good, even. For a whole five minutes. That would be something.
If only the job market weren't so terrible. If only I had the guts to just up and quit without getting a new job first. (I can hear y'all yelling back the Rocky-Horror-style retorts now: "But it is! But you don't!") So alas, I'm pretty much stuck in this job for the foreseeable future. And that sucks right now. Yeah, there might actually be some interesting stuff coming down the wire, work-wise. But, you know, I'm a chick and a Pisces and a human being, and when you put it together, it means I need more fulfillment out of life. I need to feel like I'm appreciated, like I'm doing something pointful, like I'm not just another automaton or monkey sitting at a desk.
I have really got to get those curtains to hang in my cube. Somehow I feel like they'll make me feel better, even though that makes little sense.
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no subject
Date: 2002-01-30 02:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2002-01-30 02:47 pm (UTC)And no, I believe that at this company, when you hit five years they give you a desktop clock. I don't really care about that; I'd rather have the raise, dammit. I have tons of stock options, but I've almost stopped holding out hope that those will ever be worth anything.