another day up too early, whee

[mamajoan]

My mom and I are having a lot of trouble trying to teach Isaac not to pull kitties' tails. We say "no" loudly every time we see him, we grab his hand and remove it (if we're fast enough, which we usually aren't), we explain that he's hurting the kitty, we show him how to pet kitty gently. He's even been scratched a few times, but he still isn't learning. Trouble is, kitty tails are just so darn enticing! They stick up, they wave around in the air. Especially Mr. Softie's, which is so fluffy and graceful.

I guess the other "problem" is that the kitties are so darn tolerant. My mom and I really continue to be amazed by how much these cats are putting up with. I would NEVER have imagined that Bini would take it so well -- not that he's thrilled about it, but he handles it, and he gives numerous warnings before he bites or scratches (Isaac doesn't understand the warnings, but at least Bini's giving them!), and he doesn't bite hard or scratch a lot. Plus, he knows quite well that he can go hide if he wants; but he hangs around a lot and "lets" Isaac chase him. And all of that is true of Mr. Softie too; my mom keeps saying that if you had asked her she would have said he would be hiding all the time and Nomar would be playing with the baby, but in fact it's the opposite. Mr. Softie will even lie on the floor and let Isaac flop on top of him. It's so funny. He just doesn't understand why his new playmate has this new habit of pulling his tail. :(

Anyway, if repeated tellings *and* getting scratched hasn't done it, I don't know what else there is. We'll just have to keep telling him and hope it sinks in eventually. And hope Isaac learns not to pull before the kitties learn to just hide all the time.

In other news, while I was typing this entry Isaac managed to climb up onto my bed, rolled around playing on it for a while, then climbed back down. He's turning into a little monkey! Just a few days ago he had no idea how to get up onto the bed other than saying "bed!" and whining at me....

Comments

[calligrafiti.livejournal.com]

Cats can be suprisingly tolerant. When I was around 3 and my sister was 11, I used to carry the cat around by putting his head under my arm and letting his hind legs drag on the ground. The cat would put up with this without a scratch, but as soon as I put him down he'd run over and bite my sister, as if to say, "Keep that kid away from me!"

[boniblithe.livejournal.com]

Isaac's still too young. I don't think it's really until around the age of 4 that kids start to see animals (and other people/kids, really) as entities unto themselves, with feelings that can be hurt. Up until then everything is a toy and the world revolves around the toddler.

My daughter was remarkably good with our cats and kittens and dogs, and I got a false sense of how children should be able to respond to animals from her, I think. Other kids would come over the same age and I was HORRIFIED at how they treated the cats or tried to hold and carry the kittens (by their tails, by their necks, etc). Even she wasn't 100% trustable alone with them until she was around 4. And she still got her share of bites and scratches.

Just keep telling him no and once in a while the cats are going to whack him - don't yell at the cats in front of him or be too sympathetic to the scratch, he needs to learn action = consequence, and unfortunately it might take more than one time. But it will sink in. Promise.

[boniblithe.livejournal.com]

And also - the tails are for playing. Cats will play with each others' tails and our kittens used to pounce on and bite the adult tails on a daily/hourly basis. Kittens bite hard, too, when they're wee, until they get slapped around enough to be able to figure out how to bite more gently. So I think it's hard-wired into some adult cats to be tolerant of the wee ones tugging and chewing on them. But when they've had enough, they club the kitten with a closed paw or grab their head in their teeth and don't bite down hard - just a disciplinary bite. Isaac will probably get a few of those. If the cats don't bite down to break skin, it's discipline and not anger. Most of the time when skin gets broken or scratched by teeth from a cat bite it's from trying to pull away, and getting grazed by the teeth or the cat reflexively biting harder to hold on. I learned early on when a cat grabs with teeth, to freeze until they let go, and you get much less injury that way.

[boniblithe.livejournal.com]

Argh. And when I said "anger" I meant "defense" because I don't anthropomorphize cats. *headdesk*

[emrinalexander.livejournal.com]

We had a similar problem with Dominic at that age - he kept pulling the dogs ears and logn hair. Finally, Annie caught him doing the hair pulling thing yet again, picked him up by HIS hair, and then explained that if it hurt him, what did he think it did to Jemima the dog? He finally got it *G*. I think your boy is smarter than that and will pick up on it as long as you just keep doing what you're doing (our boy always had to smack his face into a brick wall a few times before realizing we actually did occasionally know what we were talking about).

[xochiquetzl]

Cats are amazingly tolerant. Bini and Mr. Softie know Isaac is just a kitten and doesn't mean it.

The only thing I can think of is telling him Isaac can't play with the cats at all unless he can play nice, and then restricting him from the cat for x amount of time. Assuming Bini and Mr. Softie cooperate, of course.