(no subject)

[mamajoan]

algernonthemous has some interesting and troubling things to say about the sexual violence meme, in this post.

I do worry that once the meme goes beyond "one person telling her story in powerful fashion" and beyond "one person's friends taking her cue and telling their stories," once it becomes something that you can actually call a meme -- lumping it in with "what flower are you?" and "which of these movies have you seen?" -- once that happens, its power becomes diluted and it starts to lose its meaning.

I do also worry about people who are still fragile, people who maybe suffered some kind of sexual violence just yesterday or last week or last month, coming across this stuff on their friend-lists and being emotionally harmed by it. But then, what if some such people would be helped by it instead? To know that they're not alone, to see others speaking courageously about it, to know that there is help and hope? Which is more likely? Which should take precedence over the other? (impossible question with no real answer)

Mostly it just upsets me that we have to talk about this stuff at all. I hate that this crap has to happen to anyone, let alone so damn many people. :(

Comments

[ide-cyan.livejournal.com]

I think calling it a meme, making it a meme, and nothing more, is reductive, because this has the power to become a movement. In other words, a meme that means something, and does something beyond spreading itself virally, and might even accomplish social change by bringing recognition to a taboo subject, so that the harm done can be remembered, and thus prevent history from repeating itself.

[daharyn.livejournal.com]

Also, making it a meme was not the original author's intention, per se. She's on my f-list. She was speaking out for herself as much as for others, and the response it generated was something that she's found wildly draining, among other things. She never expected there to be that much response.

[mamajoan.livejournal.com]

I know, and I said that in my reply on algernonthemous's post. But the fact remains that it HAS basically become a meme, regardless of the original author's intention.

[xochiquetzl]

I think the sheer number is powerful. One in four my ass.

[mishaslair.livejournal.com]

Yeah--I think that's really important. It's like the example given in the original post where the group of friends were having dinner and the guy started counting off women because he assumed wrongly that none of them had been touched by sexual violence. I'm a little suprised to find that so many people I know have been touched by this in some way, but I think it's good for me to know that because it means I can't ignore my own experience. If it's just me, I can suppress that. But I can't run away from 1/3 of my flist. I don't know if that makes any sense, but I think the "no silence" part really needs to be taken up as an activist mantra.

[xochiquetzl]

I think the "no silence" part really needs to be taken up as an activist mantra.

Yes, I agree. 100%. I think that's the most valuable thing about this--the making the invisible visible.

And I know what you mean; I'm much more upset by what happened to my ex than what happened to me. It makes perfect sense, as far as I'm concerned.

[mamajoan.livejournal.com]

I agree ... partially. Because I'm also thinking about those survivors who can't, or don't want to, speak up. Like algernonthemous who isn't hiding about her experience but just isn't interested in becoming a statistic. Eh, go read her post, she expressed it better than me.