The Saga of the Virgin Mary
May. 10th, 2004 01:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mamajoanOK, so my friend Brian and I bought this house, right? And it's in a fairly heavily Hispanic neighborhood (mostly Portuguese to be specific), where many houses have these statues of the Virgin Mary in their front yards. I now know they are called "bathtub Madonnas" because people used to put a bathtub in the front yard to house the statue. Nowadays, though, people will build a wooden box with a glass front to hold Mary and shelter her from the elements (and animals). Some might call them tacky, but you see them everywhere and they're kind of part of the landscape.
So our house, not surprisingly, had one; and since both Brian and I are Jewish (plus we hate tacky ;) ), we knew that Mary had to go. (We have discussed numerous other things we could do with her glass-fronted box, including putting a Borg figure in it, or jack-o-lanterns, or who knows what. We haven't decided yet. :) )
Out of curiosity mainly, last Friday, I decided to post an ad on craigslist (free online marketplace/community) to see if anyone wanted Mary. It didn't feel right somehow to just dump her in the trash. So here's the text of the ad that I placed:
Here's a sampling of the responses I got. Text in [brackets] is my comments.
From: "Brown Plumbing & Heating" <removed@hotmail.com>
Date: 2004/05/07 Fri PM 12:15:27 EDT
Subject: what is the adress
(no text)
Oh My God-
Thanks for the laugh.
[that's the entire message]
this would be great for me, i allready have st. anthony on my front lawn and would love to compliment by have the Virgin Mary,
If it is not gone i can come get it asap, you can e-mail back or call me at 781-710-2041 (i will not have e-mail access after 3:00
thx!
Anthony
A Virgin Mary display in Somerville??? That's tough to believe!
Actually, I remember going for walks around my Porter Square neighborhood and I couldn't believe the number of Virgin Mary displays-- and some of them were so elaborate!! Good luck getting rid of it. Your post brightened my day and made me somewhat nostalgic for the old 'hood.
Megan
Hi,
My friend Elizabeth would love this! Let me know if you still have it. If you do, I woun't be
able to pick it up until next week. She had a painting of the Virgin Mary hanging in her room
at college, so this would be perfect for her.
Thanks,
Jen
[Yeah, obviously having had a painting of Mary in college means that she would love a 3-foot statue of Mary now!]
From: Svea [last name removed]
Date: 2004/05/07 Fri PM 02:37:00 EDT
Subject: bathtub madonna
That's what the statue thingy in your front yard is called. In the boonies, in upstate New York, the Catholic folks up there would plant old claw-foot tubs in the yard and put statues of Mary up front and center.
To show their appreciation, or something.
Over the last 2 decades, the communities have changed and real bathtub madonnas are harder and
harder to find. The new pre-fabricated concrete ones, however, are everpresent.
Your posting to Craigslist is too funny. And sweet. Thanks for making me smile.
Cheers.
Svea.
Jewish Mary:
Where are ya? Might have a good spot for her.
Joseph of Bethlehem
From: "reverend jack" <reverendjack@removed.com>
Date: 2004/05/07 Fri PM 05:07:39 EDT
Subject: Virgin Mary
Hi,
As a collector of various kitschy Christian items, I would be glad to take this off your hands.
Do you have a guess as to what it weighs? Where can we pick it up?
Sincerely,
Jack
Hi
I'm willing to take the virgin, i live in Somerville, so just reply or gime a call @XXX-XXXX
thank you
Ivan
[nyuk nyuk, you said "take the virgin"!]
Can't you just toss her on the street. I'm Catholic and I think those things are hideous!
[again, that's the entire message]
Where is she in Somerville -- I am here now and would love to have her.
I am at [REMOVED]@hotmail.com -- or call 617-XXX-XXXX. This is my (Jewish) boyfriend's e-mail : )
hi, just wondering if your virgin mary was still available, and if you could tell me more about her. I am in fact an atheist but I collect virgin maries. (strange, I know)
LOL. even if you werenot jewish she needs to go. nice ad just wanted to let ya know we agree.
Not so fast - she's Jewish too. Not the same as saving Soviet Jews (and either collecting the whole set or winning valuable prizes) but still...
Also, she may be able to verify the authenticity of the Shroud of Turin. That alone would probably be worth the airfare, to the right people.
Finally, is this house just off of Broadway, on Winter Hill? If so, I have an amusing story for you.
[end of responses]
Anyway, I picked one of the earlier responses mostly at random, and emailed the guy, got his cellphone number, and on Saturday he came by with his kid (maybe 10 years old) and they took Mary away. The guy was pretty pleased, said he is going to clean her up, put a fresh coat of paint on her, and set her up in his yard up in New Hampshire. Hopefully he'll send me a picture eventually; I was sorry that I forgot to take a photo of her before he took her away.
The whole thing was just quite entertaining. I never realized that so many people would be interested in a 3-foot-tall concrete Virgin Mary. :)
So our house, not surprisingly, had one; and since both Brian and I are Jewish (plus we hate tacky ;) ), we knew that Mary had to go. (We have discussed numerous other things we could do with her glass-fronted box, including putting a Borg figure in it, or jack-o-lanterns, or who knows what. We haven't decided yet. :) )
Out of curiosity mainly, last Friday, I decided to post an ad on craigslist (free online marketplace/community) to see if anyone wanted Mary. It didn't feel right somehow to just dump her in the trash. So here's the text of the ad that I placed:
Subject: Virgin Mary, free to good homeWithin an hour or two the responses had started pouring in. I was amazed at how many replies I got!! Most were of the straightforward "I would like to take it, let me know when and where" sort, but some were also chatty, funny, or just plain weird.
We just bought a house in Somerville and it has one of those display boxes outside, in the front yard, with a statue of the Virgin Mary. About three feet high. Well, we are Jewish so she has to go. Come and get her, she's all yours.
Here's a sampling of the responses I got. Text in [brackets] is my comments.
From: "Brown Plumbing & Heating" <removed@hotmail.com>
Date: 2004/05/07 Fri PM 12:15:27 EDT
Subject: what is the adress
(no text)
Oh My God-
Thanks for the laugh.
[that's the entire message]
this would be great for me, i allready have st. anthony on my front lawn and would love to compliment by have the Virgin Mary,
If it is not gone i can come get it asap, you can e-mail back or call me at 781-710-2041 (i will not have e-mail access after 3:00
thx!
Anthony
A Virgin Mary display in Somerville??? That's tough to believe!
Actually, I remember going for walks around my Porter Square neighborhood and I couldn't believe the number of Virgin Mary displays-- and some of them were so elaborate!! Good luck getting rid of it. Your post brightened my day and made me somewhat nostalgic for the old 'hood.
Megan
Hi,
My friend Elizabeth would love this! Let me know if you still have it. If you do, I woun't be
able to pick it up until next week. She had a painting of the Virgin Mary hanging in her room
at college, so this would be perfect for her.
Thanks,
Jen
[Yeah, obviously having had a painting of Mary in college means that she would love a 3-foot statue of Mary now!]
From: Svea [last name removed]
Date: 2004/05/07 Fri PM 02:37:00 EDT
Subject: bathtub madonna
That's what the statue thingy in your front yard is called. In the boonies, in upstate New York, the Catholic folks up there would plant old claw-foot tubs in the yard and put statues of Mary up front and center.
To show their appreciation, or something.
Over the last 2 decades, the communities have changed and real bathtub madonnas are harder and
harder to find. The new pre-fabricated concrete ones, however, are everpresent.
Your posting to Craigslist is too funny. And sweet. Thanks for making me smile.
Cheers.
Svea.
Jewish Mary:
Where are ya? Might have a good spot for her.
Joseph of Bethlehem
From: "reverend jack" <reverendjack@removed.com>
Date: 2004/05/07 Fri PM 05:07:39 EDT
Subject: Virgin Mary
Hi,
As a collector of various kitschy Christian items, I would be glad to take this off your hands.
Do you have a guess as to what it weighs? Where can we pick it up?
Sincerely,
Jack
Hi
I'm willing to take the virgin, i live in Somerville, so just reply or gime a call @XXX-XXXX
thank you
Ivan
[nyuk nyuk, you said "take the virgin"!]
Can't you just toss her on the street. I'm Catholic and I think those things are hideous!
[again, that's the entire message]
Where is she in Somerville -- I am here now and would love to have her.
I am at [REMOVED]@hotmail.com -- or call 617-XXX-XXXX. This is my (Jewish) boyfriend's e-mail : )
hi, just wondering if your virgin mary was still available, and if you could tell me more about her. I am in fact an atheist but I collect virgin maries. (strange, I know)
LOL. even if you werenot jewish she needs to go. nice ad just wanted to let ya know we agree.
Not so fast - she's Jewish too. Not the same as saving Soviet Jews (and either collecting the whole set or winning valuable prizes) but still...
Also, she may be able to verify the authenticity of the Shroud of Turin. That alone would probably be worth the airfare, to the right people.
Finally, is this house just off of Broadway, on Winter Hill? If so, I have an amusing story for you.
[end of responses]
Anyway, I picked one of the earlier responses mostly at random, and emailed the guy, got his cellphone number, and on Saturday he came by with his kid (maybe 10 years old) and they took Mary away. The guy was pretty pleased, said he is going to clean her up, put a fresh coat of paint on her, and set her up in his yard up in New Hampshire. Hopefully he'll send me a picture eventually; I was sorry that I forgot to take a photo of her before he took her away.
The whole thing was just quite entertaining. I never realized that so many people would be interested in a 3-foot-tall concrete Virgin Mary. :)
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no subject
Date: 2004-05-10 07:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-11 08:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-05-11 11:05 am (UTC)Hispanic: All persons of Mexican, Puerto Rican, Cuban, Central or South American or other Spanish culture or origin, regardless of race.
White (not of Hispanic origin): All persons in the original peoples of Europe, North Africa, or the Middle East.
The Brazilians get in under the South American clause, but I think you'd be stretching things to find Portuguese folks in the Lusitanian Diaspora or from the Old Country that wants to say they've got *Spanish* culture. Spain and Portugal may share the Iberian peninsula, but Portugal still isn't too pleased by being subsumed into Spain for 100 years back in the 16th century. They're not the most chummy of neighbors. It does sound like folks from Spain could wiggle under that definition of Hispanic.
Funny thing, my mom's boss way back when had Mom classified as Hispanic. Hell, I'm kinda sorry that they don't stretch the definition to the full Iberian peninsula, it couldn't hurt during job hunting. Besides that one job of Mom's, I think my clan has uniformly checked "white" if they choose to answer that question.