Capitalist Glorification of Coupleness Day

[mamajoan]

I am SO glad that Capitalist Glorification of Coupleness Day is almost over. It seems to have been particularly obnoxious this year; no matter where I go it's everywhere. It's in my email spam, my snail-mail spam, tv commercials, store displays. It's inescapable.

Why is Valentine's Day so evil, you ask? I'm so glad you asked that question, grasshopper.

You're screwed no matter what, with this stupid "holiday." If you're not in a relationship, you're made to feel inadequate because of that. If you ARE in a relationship, you're made to feel obligated -- whether it's an obligation to buy your sweetie something (and it better be a BIG diamond ring / box of chocolate / bouquet of flowers), or simply an obligation to have a "special" day. (Doesn't everyone know that it's nearly impossible to have a "special" day when there's that much pressure?) Personally, I'd much rather receive a box of chocolates on some other day because my sweetie really wanted to give me chocolate -- rather than receive it on Feb. 14th because someone felt that it was their "duty" to give me chocolate on that particular day.

And the marketing is just so fucking obnoxious. I really don't know how else to describe it. It's everywhere, worse than any other holiday. How many ads have you seen by now that start off, "This Valentine's Day, get your sweetie something they'll REALLY love..."? Heaven forbid you should get them something they only kind of love!

I mean, enough things in life are couple-oriented as it is. Have you ever seen a contest to win one ticket to Paris? Or dinner for one at a fancy restaurant? But Valentine's Day makes it all just so much more painfully obvious. "What do you MEAN you don't have a sweetie to buy chocolate for?" the ads seem to be asking incredulously. "What, is there something wrong with you or something?" Yes, yes there is. There's something wrong with me, and what it is is that I don't base my self-worth on having a significant other. I would love to have a significant other. I'm signed up on match.com for that very purpose. I frequently lie in bed at night agonizing over whether I'll ever be kissed again, let alone have sex, let alone love someone and be loved and spent my life with them. But that lack of companionship does not define me. I am not a missing half of something. I am a whole person with a full and interesting life, damn it. And Valentine's Day is a manufactured holiday whose entire purpose, whose raison d'être, is to make me feel bad about that. Fuck that shit. Fuck it to hell and back with a rusty chainsaw, to be precise.

And that, my friends, is the condensed version of my Valentine's Day Rant. I would have made it more eloquent, but it's late and I swore I'd go to bed early tonight. So much for that.

Comments

[azurelunatic]

For Valentines day, I don't think I'm getting my fuckbuddy/roommate anything.

I am, however, giving my best friend in all the world, Darkside, who is currently suffering from the aftereffects of a bad (ie, short) haircut, a package of hair elastics, because his hair's almost long enough now.

They didn't have the right kind of valentines day paper at the stores, so I had to make my own.

It's white, with a pattern of little green hand grenades, round black bombs with lit fuses, nice red dynamite, again with lit fuses, explosions, and here and there a small red heart.

I'm considering duplicating it electronically so that I can print out some more of it next year, it's such nice Valentine's day paper.

[thamiris.livejournal.com]

I would have made it more eloquent, but it's late and I swore I'd go to bed early tonight.

Oh, this was lovely as it was, full of admirable zingers and righteous aggravation. I was cheering you on as you ripped a new one in an industry that's all about selling inadequacy. I say we drown our sorrows with some good fic and better ice cream (I'd say chocolate, but we need to boycott the manufacturers today).

Thanks for sharing this. *g*

[(Anonymous)]

Woohoo!

You said it better than I could have.

I'll do a shot in your honor tonight.

~victoria

[sophia-helix.livejournal.com]

As a single girl lo these many years, I feel residual V-Day bitterness even now that I have someone to be with. Thank you for remembering that it sucks whether you're alone or not -- nothin' says lovin' like obligatory presents.

.maren

[mamajoan.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the last thing I want to do in my rant is piss off people who are in relationships -- that's counter to the whole point. In no way do I want to imply that being part of a couple is inherently a bad thing! Hey, some of my best friends are in relationships. ;-)

[tiggrrl.livejournal.com]

I have a sweetie, but we're not doing anything for V-day except staying home and cleaning the house (very romantic). My friend Kim and I used to write sarcastic valentine's day sonnets each year, and once she sent me a bunch of conversation hearts cut out of construction paper that said things like "Piss Off" and "You Suck".

For your singles-awareness day amusement, here is one of my old poems (not a sonnet) that I sent her one year:
Black is the color of my true love's heart,
and black is the color of his soul,
and black is the color that he'll see e'er more
when I push him in a deep dark hole.
Oh, brown is the color of my true love's hair,
and brown is the color of his eyes,
and brown is the dirt that will cover his head
and muffle his agonized cries :)