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the current dilemma
Feb. 8th, 2006 11:59 amI am getting more and more stressed about trying to find a way out of my daycare dilemma. Months ago I was pondering it and thinking, "well, I can't see a solution, but I still have months to figure it out." But now, well, I don't have months any more, and I still don't have a solution. It's upsetting.
The dilemma basically consists of two parts: what to do about daycare for Isaac while I'm home on maternity leave, and what to do about daycare for both kids after I return to work. Right now I'm focusing on the former, because the latter is a) farther away in time and b) somewhat more straightforward. (It basically boils down to, what can I afford?)
I am pretty much positive that I want Isaac to continue going to his current daycare while I'm home on leave (although I might reduce his days and/or hours). I feel that it would be the best thing for him, to stick with familiar routines and people and places, given how much upheaval will be going on in his life/our lives at that point. I really don't think that being stuck at home with me and the baby all day every day would be good for him. He'll be much better off at daycare where there are other kids to play with, toys, activities, and teachers who aren't insane from lack of sleep and trying to care for a newborn baby. And I, of course, will be better off too, not having to worry about entertaining Isaac.
The primary problem with this is that the daycare center is near my office, and is a 45-minute drive away from home. This means that if I want to take Isaac to daycare but then spend my day at home with the baby, I'll have to spend THREE HOURS in the car every day. 45 minutes there and 45 back to drop him off in the morning, and the same again in the evening to pick him up. Words cannot express how much I loathe, detest, and abhor the idea of spending three hours in the car every day. I already hate doing my commute for just half of that per day (to work and back), and truthfully, one of the big things I look forward to about my maternity leave is getting a break from that commute! Plus I don't think it'll be good for me physically, when I'm still recovering from giving birth. So I really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do that.
But the only alternative as far as I can see is finding someone else to do it. And I don't seem to have anyone. I've wracked my brain trying to think of anyone I know who would be both able and willing to do it, and I haven't come up with anyone. That leaves me with the very unappealing idea of paying a stranger to do it. I hate that idea kind of a lot. It's bad enough to think about entrusting a stranger with my kid, but entrusting a stranger with my kid in a car! For an hour and a half a day! Ugh. And of course, then I'd have to pay, and I can't really afford it. Although I would find a way, if it came to that.
I've thought about asking one of the daycare teachers, or one of the other parents. Unfortunately, though, they pretty much all live near the daycare (of course) so I don't know if that's workable. It's a weird thing to try to approach with someone anyway. I tried dropping a hint in front of the one daycare teacher who is the most, uh, forceful about being in everyone's business ;) and figured that if anyone would pick up on it and say "Oh, you should ask so-and-so" it would be her. But she didn't. So I don't know where to go next. I may just write up a flyer and ask the daycare director to post it in the staff breakroom. I guess it couldn't hurt. I just don't know though. The whole trust issue as relates to putting my kid in a car with someone else is so huge. :(
Aside from all of the above, of course, there is the question of how to pay for Isaac's daycare while I'm on maternity leave. But I can't really be worrying about that now. I have to focus on the more basic question of how he's going to get there, and worry about the other thing later.
(I did find out last week that when Isaac moves up to the 3-year-old room -- which he can do when he's 2 years 9 months old, i.e., next month -- his daycare tuition decreases by $50 per week!! That's a big savings. And if I reduce him from 4 days a week to 3, it'll go down even more. So that's something to be hopeful about.)
The dilemma basically consists of two parts: what to do about daycare for Isaac while I'm home on maternity leave, and what to do about daycare for both kids after I return to work. Right now I'm focusing on the former, because the latter is a) farther away in time and b) somewhat more straightforward. (It basically boils down to, what can I afford?)
I am pretty much positive that I want Isaac to continue going to his current daycare while I'm home on leave (although I might reduce his days and/or hours). I feel that it would be the best thing for him, to stick with familiar routines and people and places, given how much upheaval will be going on in his life/our lives at that point. I really don't think that being stuck at home with me and the baby all day every day would be good for him. He'll be much better off at daycare where there are other kids to play with, toys, activities, and teachers who aren't insane from lack of sleep and trying to care for a newborn baby. And I, of course, will be better off too, not having to worry about entertaining Isaac.
The primary problem with this is that the daycare center is near my office, and is a 45-minute drive away from home. This means that if I want to take Isaac to daycare but then spend my day at home with the baby, I'll have to spend THREE HOURS in the car every day. 45 minutes there and 45 back to drop him off in the morning, and the same again in the evening to pick him up. Words cannot express how much I loathe, detest, and abhor the idea of spending three hours in the car every day. I already hate doing my commute for just half of that per day (to work and back), and truthfully, one of the big things I look forward to about my maternity leave is getting a break from that commute! Plus I don't think it'll be good for me physically, when I'm still recovering from giving birth. So I really, really, really, REALLY don't want to do that.
But the only alternative as far as I can see is finding someone else to do it. And I don't seem to have anyone. I've wracked my brain trying to think of anyone I know who would be both able and willing to do it, and I haven't come up with anyone. That leaves me with the very unappealing idea of paying a stranger to do it. I hate that idea kind of a lot. It's bad enough to think about entrusting a stranger with my kid, but entrusting a stranger with my kid in a car! For an hour and a half a day! Ugh. And of course, then I'd have to pay, and I can't really afford it. Although I would find a way, if it came to that.
I've thought about asking one of the daycare teachers, or one of the other parents. Unfortunately, though, they pretty much all live near the daycare (of course) so I don't know if that's workable. It's a weird thing to try to approach with someone anyway. I tried dropping a hint in front of the one daycare teacher who is the most, uh, forceful about being in everyone's business ;) and figured that if anyone would pick up on it and say "Oh, you should ask so-and-so" it would be her. But she didn't. So I don't know where to go next. I may just write up a flyer and ask the daycare director to post it in the staff breakroom. I guess it couldn't hurt. I just don't know though. The whole trust issue as relates to putting my kid in a car with someone else is so huge. :(
Aside from all of the above, of course, there is the question of how to pay for Isaac's daycare while I'm on maternity leave. But I can't really be worrying about that now. I have to focus on the more basic question of how he's going to get there, and worry about the other thing later.
(I did find out last week that when Isaac moves up to the 3-year-old room -- which he can do when he's 2 years 9 months old, i.e., next month -- his daycare tuition decreases by $50 per week!! That's a big savings. And if I reduce him from 4 days a week to 3, it'll go down even more. So that's something to be hopeful about.)
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